Seasons

time the most cherished
always slips away

to fool yourself
is to say there are
no regrets

words spoken
have been said before

to simply live
is good
and good enough

wanting more
is unsettling

enjoying less
is rewarding

the one's I love
and leave behind
my gift to you
is this

just be you
and love it

find joy in now
whatever that may be

if I see you again
we'll count ourselves lucky

let's laugh and live once more

Edwards Mansion 1983

Another 1st Place winner at the Academy 1983

Scratch Board 1983

Won 1st place at Loma Linda Academy for this Scratch Board work..

Moving Out

Rolled Up The Driveway and Saw This..

So yeah, looks like the end is near and time to prepare for a new beginning..

Hoo fuckin' rah!

P.S. I'm really sad right now.. I grew up in this house since 1977.. oh well :'(

Grandkids

Left to Right from Top is Mark, Glen, Guy, Greg, Davin
Lance, Francine, Grandma, X, Grandpa, Gary, Grant
Me next to Francine
Bottom from Left is Jonathan, Allyn, Christopher, Sydney, Anthony

Dean & Shianne

2005 - 2012

To Be Or Not

But first..

Mathilda May from movie "Lifeforce"

so..

Back in 86' I hated God for the umpteenth time as normal 16 year olds do.

So I asked him, why should I believe in you?

Especially when there's so much bullshit in this world that you can prevent, but won't!

So he said, to love me is to know me..

I asked him then how do I know who you are?

Then he made me list everything about himself.

• Light
• Love
• Righteousness
• Existence
• etc.

And then he told me to recognize the opposite of himself..

• Darkness
• Hate
• Sin
• Nothingness
• etc.

So for years, I went on to believe that God was separate from the opposite of himself.

Until..

Mandelbrot Set

 He told me.. what if Existence and Nothingness were ONE?

I said how?

He said "the cross"

This is the place where Eternal Life and Damnation has intersected and become one.

Because Christ, who is One with the Father - descended into hell upon death.

Christ who is One with Life also became one with Death, the Nothingness and complete opposite of what God the Father is.

In essence Existence is Nothing, like Life is Death.

I can honestly say that I love and hate God.

And I believe that's the way he wants it to be.